We celebrate balance, champion wellbeing, and preach the importance of boundaries. Yet when ambitious professionals choose to push themselves - deliberately, purposefully, for a defined season - we often meet them with suspicion rather than support.
Sam Shosanya, General Manager of FrontTier, the College's leadership accelerator, has spent years coaching senior leaders who sense there's more they could achieve but feel unable to say it out loud. His work reveals an uncomfortable truth: we speak endlessly about balance while failing those who genuinely want to stretch themselves toward excellence.
We spoke with Sam about the seasons we don't talk about—those deliberate periods of stretch that produce exceptional work, the crucial distinction between purposeful intensity and unhealthy pressure, and how leaders can approach their limits wisely without apology.
Having spent many years coaching senior leaders, founders, and highly capable professionals across a range of industries, Sam has seen a theme emerge “with remarkable consistency.”
“We speak frequently about balance, wellbeing, and the importance of boundaries, all of which I value deeply,” Sam says. “Yet we rarely speak honestly about what it actually takes to produce something exceptional. Not average. Not solid. Exceptional. The kind of work that moves an organisation forward, reshapes a market, or represents the pinnacle of a person’s capability.”
“If you look at environments where extraordinary results are expected as the norm, whether in elite sport, high growth entrepreneurship, or military leadership, there is no ambiguity about the level of commitment required,” Sam observes. “It is intense, often uncomfortable, and purposefully stretching. These individuals understand that certain goals are only achieved when you intentionally place yourself near your limits, because without ever approaching those limits, you have no real way of knowing what is possible or how far your talent and discipline can actually take you.”
While they do not operate at this level indefinitely, they are in that season, they are completely aligned with what the moment demands. However, Sam notes that in the workplace, we often hesitate to say this aloud.
“We shy away from admitting that meaningful excellence often requires periods of unusual focus and disciplined sacrifice, and in doing so we fail those who genuinely want to make an extraordinary contribution,” Sam says. “It is not possible to produce Olympic level outcomes with a gentle level of effort, and pretending otherwise does not protect people from burnout; it simply prevents us from having a more mature conversation about seasonality, intentional stretch, and the distinction between purposeful intensity and unhealthy, unending pressure.”
Choosing when to commit yourself is crucial.
“I once worked with a senior executive who stepped into a major organisational transformation,” Sam says. “She knew the next period would require more of her: longer days, deeper focus, and the willingness to hold the weight of decisions that few others could shoulder. She was not overwhelmed. She was not reluctant. She was ready and fully aware that this was a deliberate season, chosen because it aligned with the impact she wanted to make.”
According to Sam, what unsettled her had nothing to do with the work itself. Even though she had consciously and freely committed to this period of intensity, she felt ‘quietly judged’ by colleagues.
"Her colleagues reacted not just to her ambition but to her intensity, regarding both with suspicion, as if any significant commitment automatically represented a failure of balance or a personal flaw,” Sam explains. “She said to me, ‘I am choosing this, and it aligns with what I want, so why does it feel like I am not supposed to say it out loud?’ Her question captures the unease that many ambitious professionals feel.”
There is a cultural tendency at times to treat ambition and intensity together as something unsafe or socially inconvenient, rather than as qualities that, when wisely held, can drive meaningful progress.
“For me, ambition that is anchored in values and paired with intentional discipline is a form of stewardship. It is choosing to develop the abilities and opportunities placed in front of you instead of shrinking back because others prefer a slower or more comfortable pace,” he observes. “Yes, seasons of intensity carry costs. I have experienced that myself. But the defining feature of those seasons was that they were deliberate, time bound, and guided by purpose. Much like the military, which understands the need for strategic surges followed by structured recovery, genuine high performance is not about being permanently stretched. It is about knowing when to push, how far to push, and when to reset.”
Seasons of intensity, followed by ‘off seasons’, have served high performers well.
“There is an entrepreneur I have worked with who recognised he had a very limited window to bring a complex platform to life,” Sam says. “For the better part of a year and a half, he operated with extraordinary focus, not because he was driven by frantic hustle but because the opportunity required a sustained level of effort that simply could not be spread across a longer timeline. He communicated clearly with those around him, created structure around the season, and honoured the moment it was time to return to a more sustainable rhythm.”
Sam also coached a senior leader who stepped into a global role.
“The role had layers of complexity that would have overwhelmed many others,” Sam says. “The first months were demanding, fast paced, and relentless, but she never lost sight of her values or her purpose. She embraced the season because she knew the growth it would produce, and she remained anchored to what mattered, so her intensity did not distort her judgement or her priorities.”
And then there is the former athlete who transitioned into executive leadership and immediately recognised what many professionals don’t: that extraordinary commitment is only healthy when it is bounded by purpose and values.
“His approach was straightforward. If the season required a stretch that was still aligned with who he was and what he stood for, he leaned in fully. When it began to conflict with his core values, he adjusted his pace without apology or hesitation,” Sam says.
Law is a profession which attracts high performers. Long hours are common.
“There are, undeniably, industries where permanent overwork is normalised and mistaken for dedication,” Sam says. “That is not ambition, and it is certainly not excellence. It is dysfunction disguised as commitment, and part of my work as a coach is helping leaders recognise this difference so they do not fall into the trap of confusing unhealthy pressure with meaningful progress.”
“At the same time, I am increasingly cautious of environments where ambition, combined with intensity, is treated as something suspicious or inherently problematic. The belief that ‘if you are pushing hard right now, something must be wrong’ is just as misguided as the belief that constant strain is somehow noble. Sometimes pushing hard is precisely the right thing to do. The issue is not the effort itself but whether the effort is chosen, purposeful, and aligned with values.”
From Sam’s perspective, the distinctions are clear:
“When we name these distinctions openly, ambition and wellbeing can sit together without undermining one another,” Sam points out.
Anyone who has done anything extraordinary knows that outlier achievements have no maps. That’s what makes them outliers.
“There are no guardrails at the summit of a mountain,” Sam says.
Safety falls away, because what you’re doing is decidedly beyond your comfort zone – and perhaps the comfort zone of many people. “Getting to the summit is hard and risky. It’s not for everyone. But it’s well worth it for those who choose to embrace the risk, and it aligns with their values and purpose.”
To allow more of us to hit peak potential – to summit our own Everests – Sam suggests rethinking our thinking.
“What I am advocating for is a more honest and grown-up conversation about what it means to build a meaningful and impactful career,” Sam urges. “A conversation that respects balance but also respects the individuals who want to stretch themselves to see what they are capable of achieving. A conversation that acknowledges that extraordinary commitment is sometimes the right and necessary choice, and that restoration is equally necessary when the season changes.”
According to Sam, ambition, when paired with wisdom and self-awareness, is not the enemy of wellbeing. In fact, it is often the engine that drives contribution, growth, and even a deeper sense of purpose in a person’s work.
“Ultimately, the goal is not to live at full stretch indefinitely. The goal is to craft a life and career that aligns with whatever calling or conviction drives your best work. There will be seasons of intensity and seasons of rest, seasons of building, and seasons of consolidation. The real art lies in recognising which season you are in, approaching it deliberately, and having the courage to step near your limits so you can discover what is genuinely possible.”